Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
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