Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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