i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
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