just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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