When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
