I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
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