Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Randomize