i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
