I'll bet she douches with gravy.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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