Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Randomize