Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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