You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
