the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
