I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Randomize
