Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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