David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
the liver wants what the liver wants
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Randomize
