Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
He has the fingertips of a God
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
