matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
