you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
