Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
