i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Randomize
