Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
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