There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Vodka?
Forever.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
