Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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