i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
