It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
