What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
