If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Randomize
