its not stalking. its research.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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