Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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