Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
