Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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