Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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