I molested 6 butterflies tonight
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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