I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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