two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
