Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
