i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
