her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Randomize
