Plan B is the new Plan A
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
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