Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
