dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
