You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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