South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
