nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
