i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
