We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
