So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
