It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
