But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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